[the therefore]

The past few months the word "therefore" has been on my heart, mind and path. In my conversations, quiet times and songs. Constantly popping up and consistently pulling through.

According to Webster, it means "for that reason; because of that; to that end." It's never a word you start a thought or instruction with. It's a connector. Between what you've just said and what you want to say next. Because the statement that follows a "therefore" is always in light of what's before it - something else that must be read, learned and understood first.

And what's stuck with me the last few months is that the Bible is loaded with therefore-type statements. God never seems to deliver commands without that transition word or a phrase like it. "Because of X now do Y" or "in light of Y live like Z."

It's never "get your act together and shape up. Suck it up. Seriously what's your deal?"

It's always, "Remember what I've done for you. Remember who I am. Remember the way I have persistently and consistently followed through on every single thing I've promised throughout time and eternity. Then. Therefore. In light of that. Go live and serve and love this way, the way I originally made you, the way that will ultimately bring you the most peace, fulfillment and joy." God's commands are never apart from God's promises you know?

It's easy to forget that though.

There are things left undone. Things I know God calls me to do that I don't particularly want to do or be. Things I just can't seem to get figured out and truth I know but fail again and again to trust. The things I want to do I don't always do. The things I know I shouldn't do I continue to slip in.

And it's like, "Jeez God. Why am I such a failure? Why am I not better at this and trusting in that and able to be and do and live the way I know you want me to?"

When I find myself in this trap, I always have to come back to Romans 8:1-2. ". . there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit set me free from the law of sin and death." I am not condemned because I don't always have the faith, trust or love I should. I'm rebuked because I've failed to spend time with the One who gives those things.

Because when God calls us to do hard things, to give up hard dreams, to love hard people, to do more than just exist in this life and to hand over the rights to ourselves that we never really had anyway, we only find the strength and desire to do that when we spend time remembering Who He is and what He's done.

Everything begins at the cross and John 15 - remaining in God. Never with us trying harder, working longer, doing more or attempting to conjure up the things we know we're supposed to feel and do when truth is, we really don't feel them. We really don't care to do that. We're human. Painfully, obviously human. And that's not a miserable thing to dwell on. It's just reality.

This is the beauty of therefore, especially on days like today when I need it most. When I struggle with having any sort of patience or love or desire to be with people or serve people. When I wish the world would just stop spinning and running and my schedule would stop being filled. I realize it's not always a rebuking that I need, though, but a gentle, quiet reminder of Who He is and what He's done for me.

Passages like Isaiah 54:10 draw me back: "'Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed,' says the LORD who has compassion on you."

And I'm reminded in my quiet time that I serve and love and give and hand over my time, moneys, talents and plans because of what God's done for me. Never because it's noble. Never because it's a religious duty. Never to earn God's favor. Never to try and avoid His rightful wrath. Always in light of His compassion, grace and mercy in my life. Always the cross comes first. Always the time with God. Always the gospel for me before others. Then the action. Then the ministry. Then the therefore.