[things i am learning]

Every day I'm technically in ministry. I say technically because by title I am, but truthfully, every day of my life following Christ is ministry. The world watches my actions, hears my words, sees my reactions, perceives my heart's inner peace. It took a title for me to start realizing this, but here are just some of the things I have learned by God's grace the last six months in "ministry":

1. I am human. I am in-capable of loving people well by my strength or courage. I am headed toward defeat when I fail to spend adequate time with the Lord and draw on my wisdom instead of His.

I like this quote that reminds me of that: "The language of all true faith is simply 'thank you!'. That is your response to God. Don't complicate it. Jesus Christ has give you Himself because you do not have what it takes to live the Christian life." [I. Gordon]

2. I have more questions than answers, and that is ok.

3. Everything I do is a reflection of the cross if I claim to follow Christ. I spend my days with people who mostly don't know Him or many times haven't even heard what He's done for them, and that makes you reflect on your words and your actions much differently. Sad that it took me til now to really think deeply and seriously about what gospel I preach with every aspect of my life. Not just during "on the clock" hours but more-so the "off the clock" times.

4. God is worth it. Brad Buser told us the story last summer of doubting whether he would be any good at taking the gospel to an unreached tribe in Papau New Guinea, and as he voiced his hesitation one last time, his leader said, "Based on what Jesus has done, get on the train (headed to missions training) unless God shuts you down. He's big enough to shut you down."

Based on what Jesus has done for me, I am on the train to spend my life sharing the gospel with people who have never heard. And over and over and over again, despite criticism from some of the people closest to me and doubt in my own heart and times when I just want to shut the world out, God has been faithful in reminding and assuring me what Jesus has done in my life and Who He is. That is enough I do say. Matthew 28:18-20 is a verse. We don't need a "call" when we have a verse. The ultimate question is whether Jesus is Lord of our lives or not. Who has commanded us to go is so much more powerful than the what He's asked us to do.